The Perfect Food
Yes, you heard it here first. Sheena has at last identified the perfect food.
Drum roll.... please.
Ta da!
It is: The Pepperoni Stick.
Low carb, high protein. Better brands such as Pillers (the hometown hero) also bereft of awful milky/wheaty/soy shit filler.

The pepperoni stick is portable. It is dry. It is highly compact. You can put it in your pocket for later. Or tuck it in a wallet for the cab ride to the meeting. Or slyly and sexily pin up your thick wavy auburn locks until just that moment in the evening when you pull it out and let the hair slide into your eyes, taking a bite off the end for emphasis.
You can throw it across the room and nothing gets dirty. It looks just like a pen when you stick it behind the ear. It works as a pointer during an impassioned business plan review meeting.
Sheena defies her gentle readers to come up with anything as well rounded.
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