Sunday, March 05, 2006

Getting Tough on Chime

At some point over the last couple of weeks, someone has put up a set of windchimes within earshot of my apartment. I am not entirely sure if it is another suite in this building, or the one across the street. What would possess a person to inflict the urban noise pollution version of Chinese water torture on nearby tenants and neighbours?

Practitioners of feng shui believe the dulcet tones have a healing energy for our bodies and souls; enhancing the spirit/body/mind connection. My neighbour will need this healing energy if the f**cking chimes aren't down by the end of the day.

Progressive urban centres such as Markham Ontario have explicitly banned windchimes between the hours of 7pm and 7am. This is a reasonable compromise, and a way to ensure better fitness of its citizens as the twice daily ritual of chime-on/chime-off is established among households.

Unfortunately, some jurisdictions, like the City of Victoria, have amended their noise bylaws from an annoyance based system to a decible based system, thus rendering legal recourse useless against the vexatious and brain destroying clinks and clangs which haunt my every waking moment.

The online retailer SpiritWinds.com offers a unique "Wind Chime Necklace" for sale. Not necessary, really. If my neighbour wants a set of chimes wrapped around his neck, he need only tip me off to his suite number.

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